Whodunit?
by Luthien Tinuviel
Summary: Well, it's a Murder Mystery Weekend thing in Rivendell, and all the characters have to get switched around. Talking breakfast and an Elf of Rivendell!
1. Welcome to Rivendell! No Objections!

DISCLAIMER: If I owned anyone in this fic, then I would not be sitting here typing this, I'd be rolling in dough (and I don't mean for baking either!) If you accuse me of having stolen them, I'll set a rabid pigeon on you!  
  
Ladies and Gentlemen, Elves, Dwarves, Men, Hobbits, Wizards, Orcs and Dark Lords of all ages, greetings!  
  
This is the first (I hope) Middle Earth Whodunit (murder mystery).  
  
I guess I'll get on with it, in case no one's actually reading all this. The first couple of chapters will be from Legolas' point of view, but I'll switch as required. By the way, I DO NOT DISLIKE ANYONE. Don't attack me if I do tiny bits of bashing here and there, it's all in the name of. art. I guess!  
  
  
  
Legolas, Prince of Mirkwood, handed the reins of his horse to a stable hand who had come for the very purpose of getting them from him. He then made his way to the Last Homely House.  
  
Walking tall, noble and Elven, Legolas spotted Aragorn and bounded over to him excitedly.  
  
"Isn't this going to be awesome?" he asked.  
  
"Eh?" asked the Heir of Elendil. "Have you seen Arwen anywhere?"  
  
Legolas scowled. "No!" he said curtly, "in fact, I don't think she's been invited!"  
  
Aragorn gasped, "Not invited?" he asked in alarm, "She'll kill me!"  
  
A voice from a bush next to them startled them both. "Oh little miss Elven Princess has been invited alright!" the piece of foliage said irritably, "but guess who was forgotten? AGAIN!"  
  
The Ranger narrowed his eyes. "Glorfindel?"  
  
The bush nodded, sort of. It was about to speak some more when the daughter of Elrond showed up.  
  
She snuck up behind Aragorn and stuck a sword into his neck.  
  
"Ow!" yowled the Ranger, "That hurt!"  
  
Arwen was not discouraged. She grinned wickedly and said, in her haughtiest voice, "What's this? A Ranger caught off his guard?"  
  
"By a demented She-Elf from the Underworld," muttered Legolas. Arwen heard him with her High Elven hearing, and shoved him onto Glorfindel the bush.  
  
Glorfindel groaned loudly. "Get off me, Leggs, I'm gonna hurt that woman!"  
  
Legolas hopped up. "I suggest we wait until she is far away from her father, who just happens to be king of the Noldor, and is thus very powerful!"  
  
Glorfindel nodded thoughtfully. "He looks like Agent Smith, too."  
  
With that the two Elves headed inside the House of Elrond.  
  
"Greetings, friends of old!" said Elrond, who was standing on a platform of sorts, "If there are any strangers from distant lands here, please leave immediately, this is a private party."  
  
Several dwarves left the room, and a couple of grumpy old men too.  
  
Elrond grinned wickedly and continued. "Welcome to the first Murder Mystery Weekend at Rivendell! As your invitations have informed you, you will each be given an envelope containing the name of the person you will portray. NO OBJECTIONS. You will have to act and even dress like that person does. NO OBJECTIONS. One of you will die. NO OBJECTIONS. It is up to the rest of you to find out who the murderer is. NO OBJECTIONS. The murderer, whoever he or she is will not be at liberty to reveal his or her identity to anyone. NO OBJECTIONS."  
  
It seemed that Lord Elrond had found a phrase he liked using. After he'd finished his speech, he just sat down repeating "NO OBJECTIONS, NO OBJECTIONS, NO OBJECTIONS!" over and over to himself.  
  
Everyone else avoided him.  
  
Random nameless Elves handed out pretty leaf shaped envelopes to all the guests.  
  
Legolas excitedly opened his. "Please be Aragorn!" he muttered. The Heir of Isildur was his hero. His face fell when he saw the name in silver lettering inside the envelope.  
  
*GALADRIEL*  
  
Poor Legolas? Wait 'til you see who the others are! Tell me what you lot think so far! Sorry if the chapter's a bit short- the next will be a little longer! This was sort of an introduction to the whole scenario! 


	2. And the others are

Thanks so much for the reviews, I'm glad someone's reading this! Okay, we now find out who the others are!  
  
  
  
Legolas stood rooted to the spot, oblivious to all the random exclamations in the crowd around him. Galadriel. He didn't want to be Galadriel. He didn't even like Galadriel. She creeped him out.  
  
Next to him, Glorfindel tore up his envelope in frustration. "No! No! No! No! No! No! No!" He muttered. "I do not want to be that evil murderous female!"  
  
Legolas moved away from the slightly berserk Elf, feeling a tinge of sympathy for him, and went to find out about the rest of his friends.  
  
He found Aragorn staring at his unopened envelope, his hands shaking uncontrollably. "I don't want to find out," he whispered. Arwen finally got frustrated with him and snatched the envelope from him, ripping it open.  
  
"There," she said with satisfaction, "You're Frodo!"  
  
Aragorn sighed in relief. "I was afraid I'd end up a woman!" he said, "What kind of future King wears a dress?"  
  
Arwen looked ready to begin a lecture on Women's Rights, and Legolas left the place wondering whom she was to play and feeling sorry for the poor soul. Little did he know that he was feeling sorry for himself.  
  
Boromir was bawling in a corner, hunched up. "Can you believe this?" he asked Legolas when he came over, "I am me! I, Boromir son of Denethor, am myself! Where's the fun in that? I'll probably die, too!"  
  
Legolas shook his head sympathetically, and was about to say something when Gimli waltzed over.  
  
"I'm the luckiest man.er Dwarf.er, Elf. in the world! La la la!" He sang. "I'm Celeborn! I'm married to-"  
  
Legolas cut him off dryly, deciding to burst someone's balloon. "Me. I'm Galadriel, Dwarfy."  
  
Gimli looked outraged and upset. "But I thought." he trailed off, pouting.  
  
That looked so weird that Legolas turned his attention elsewhere.  
  
Sam was sitting as close as he could to Glorfindel and apparently professing his love for her. him. Glorfindel was not happy, but was playing along because the Hobbit had threatened to concuss him if he didn't.  
  
"Do you remember when we first met?" he asked.  
  
"Er, no." replied Sam, "But I, Aragorn, will try and remember. maybe if I chewed on some weeds or something."  
  
Arwen stepped in between the two. "How dare you question him?" she asked a shocked Glorfindel. "He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn. You owe him your immortality."  
  
Celeborn chose that moment to come along, and he addressed Glorfindel. "Arwen! I will not have you talking to that ruffian!"  
  
"But he is Aragorn!" said the real Arwen.  
  
"I do not sound like that," muttered Legolas disgustedly, walking away.  
  
Not too far from them was a figure covered with a white cloth. Legolas lifted the cloth, curiosity overcoming the sudden fear that it might be a fangirl.  
  
"Frodo? What are you doing?"  
  
"I'm Glorfindel, so I'm pretending not to exist!"  
  
Merry Brandybuck was following Aragorn around everywhere, holding what appeared to be a frying pan.  
  
"Mister Frodo!" he called after the man, "Mister Frodo, are you hungry? Thirsty? Tired? Sleepy?"  
  
"Leave me alone, Sam!" snapped Aragorn.  
  
"I know you feel that way, Frodo," said Merry. "But it's for your own good, you know! And you know what Gandalf said- always feed him Samiadoc Gamgybuck!"  
  
Aragorn almost laughed, but then remembering how little Frodo does of that, stopped and only stared amusedly.  
  
"YOU CAN'T CHANGE YOUR NAME!" snapped Elrond, coming over. "You stick to the name given to you. NO OBJECTIONS!!!" He then threw a bucket of water at the two of them and laughed madly as he ran away, looking very ridiculous.  
  
Galadriel floated, or rather stomped over, looking furious for some reason. "I'm a Dwarf!" she said fiercely, looking Legolas in the eye, "Get out of my way, Elf!"  
  
"I'm Galadriel, you know," Legolas said, almost impulsively.  
  
The Elven queen looked ecstatic. "I'm your biggest fan, my lady," she squealed in that same gruff voice, but she was interrupted there by a loud crash and the sound of glass breaking.  
  
"Oops!" said Gandalf, looking at the table and cringing.  
  
Pippin Took scurried over holding a long wooden stick, a grumpy look on his face. "Fool of a Took!" He declared, jumping up to pull on Gandalf's ear.  
  
"Owwwww!" roared the wizard.  
  
"STAY IN CHARACTER! NO OBJECTIONS!" bellowed Elrond, before running over to shake hands excitedly with Gandalf. "Nice one!"  
  
Legolas rolled his eyes. If he was supposed to be in character already.  
  
"Oh Gimli dear."  
  
  
  
Alrighty then, just to recap, Legolas is Galadriel, Galadriel is Gimli, Gimli is Celeborn, Celeborn is Elrond, Elrond is Merry, Merry is Sam, Sam is Aragorn, Aragorn is Frodo, Frodo is Glorfindel, Glorfindel is Arwen, Arwen is Legolas.  
  
That leaves Pippin as Gandalf and Gandalf as Pippin. Poor Boromir is himself! Tell me what you think!  
  
Perhaps I'll put Figwit in later. next time, our ol' pals get into costume! And someone dies!  
  
Thanks again for bothering to read this! 


	3. Singing Elves and Shaven Dwarves!

Sorry for a long delay, but school can be enough to drive one insane!! Hope this won't be overly confusing!  
  
"I look like Britney Spears."  
  
Legolas was not in the least bit pleased at having to wear a dress. Gimli had suggested that he braid his hair overnight to give it that wavy quality that Galadriel had, and, unfortunately, he'd woken up looking like the teenage pop singer of doom.  
  
"Looks kinda nice," said Arwen, dressed in complete Legolas garb, much to his dismay.  
  
It was the first day of total in-character-ness, which included costumes. Legolas didn't know who had broken into his wardrobe, but he was not happy. Elrond's daughter was wearing his best clothes- he'd only bought them the week before, and hadn't even asked Aragorn (the real one) if it was good.  
  
Gimli had had a little bit of trouble getting into Celeborn's robes, as was evident from the large amount of thumping about coming from his room, but how he turned up that morning shocked everyone, including a furry footed Elrond.  
  
The Dwarf had shaved.  
  
The real Galadriel fainted. Arwen screamed in horror, and, much to Legolas' surprise, so did Glorfindel. The Anti-Arwen Elf, now decked out in her clothes, seemed to have taken it into his head that he really was Arwen. It was rather scary. Just last night, he had knocked out four random elves and stolen the real Arwen's necklace from Aragorn.  
  
"Gim- er- Celeborn!" exclaimed Pippin, waving his staff around like a lunatic. It was much too big for him, and to avoid tripping over it, he would tie it to his huge, fake and very messy beard.  
  
"Gandalf, there you are!" said Gimli, in a surprisingly un- gruff voice. "Eight there were there yet nine there were set out from Rivendell. Tell me, where were you Gandalf, for I much desired to speak with you! Where do you buy your robes? Mine keep catching fire because of all the glowing!"  
  
Pippin was about to answer, when he gestured suddenly and produced Merry from behind a nearby table.  
  
"Confound you Samwise Gamgee!" he shrieked, before falling over in the effort of holding Merry up.  
  
"Help me Mr. Frodo!" squealed Merry, waving his saucepan and shears about.  
  
"What's wrong, Sam?" asked Aragorn wildly, wearing Frodo's garments, which looked like biker shorts on him.  
  
"I'm stuck in Gandalf's beard! Help!!!"  
  
"Look Pip!" shouted Elrond suddenly.  
  
Gandalf (the real one) turned to watch Elrond. The Wizard hadn't shaven, but had tied his beard into a bun. He looked slightly revolting. Especially since he too was wearing clothes that fit him like biker shorts.  
  
Elrond had acquired a large firecracker, and had lighted it too. Both he and Gandalf were thrown to the ground when it went off.  
  
"Nooo!!!" yelled Pippin and Merry as the firework collided into them. They were sent three feet into the air and fell to the ground onto Galadriel (who was unhurt because she was wearing bulky armour and a large fake beard, which was actually the contents of her pillow, all dyed a bright, bright, bright red)  
  
Aragorn hurried to them, looking concerned. "Oh Sam," he said, "Don't you remember Gandalf saying 'Don't you burn, Samwise Gamgee!' and you said you didn't mean to?" he stamped a few times on Pippin's beard as he spoke, to put out a small flame on it.  
  
Merry got to his feet, looking full of Sam- like things to say, but Pippin ran straight to Gandalf and Elrond, twisting their ears. "Meriadoc Brandybuck, and Peregrin Took, I should have known!" He actually smiled in pleasure when they howled. The smile was short lived though, when the Wizard and the Elven King both stood up, lifting the Hobbit into the air. Considering that he was still holding onto their ears, this was very stupid of them, and they howled even louder.  
  
Arwen interrupted Pippin's admonition. The daughter of Elrond, who was now pretending to be the Prince of Mirkwood, had an electric guitar, and began jamming as she sang, very off key, (to the tune of 'Wild Thing')  
  
"WILD KING!  
  
HE MAKES MY HEART SING!  
  
HE DOES EV'RYTHING COOLLY!  
  
WILD KING!!"  
  
Sam emerged at that moment, unsteady because of a large plastic sword at his waist. "Nice song there, Ar- I mean Legolas!" Arwen smiled smugly at Glorfindel.  
  
"Hey!" said Glorfindel, pushing Arwen away. "That's MY Aragorn!" He smiled at Sam and gave him the necklace he'd stolen. "This is for you, Aragorn dear!" he said, "I choose a mortal life! Oh yeah, and don't you dare give it to Mary- Sue!"  
  
Sam looked slightly confused, but put on the necklace anyway. The real Arwen glared at Glorfindel. "You can't make him wear a NECKLACE!" she yelled. "He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn, and heir to the throne-"  
  
Legolas was very annoyed by Arwen's display of Aragorn fandom, not because she was off key, but because he was afraid the real Aragorn might decide he liked the song. He liked Arwen enough anyway to begin with. The Elven prince needed a plan, and for it to work, he had to put off being Galadriel for a while. Getting into his normal clothes, he got his own guitar, put on a pair of sunglasses he'd found in Elrond's room, and sang a song he'd been saving for Aragorn's birthday. (He'd stolen the tune from the 'Lion King', of course)  
  
"He's gonna be a mighty king,  
  
So all of you beware,  
  
Aragorn's so cool, you know,  
  
And he's Isildur's Heir!  
  
He's gonna marry an Elven maid,  
  
Like no King has before,  
  
And Gondor will be his kingdom,  
  
Who cares 'bout Denethor!  
  
His reign will be a super awesome thing!  
  
Oh he just can't wait to be King!!"  
  
Boromir began making his way towards him, he obviously cared about Denethor, but Elrond reached Legolas first.  
  
"Mister Greenleaf." he said ominously, switching into Agent Smith mode, taking his sunglasses back and putting them on. "Do you remember what I told you, Mister Greenleaf? Stay in character. NO OBJECTIONS!!!!!!"  
  
He then bounded over to Gandalf and began plotting something with him.  
  
Meanwhile, Glorfindel and Celeborn were having a father- daughter argument as they walked down the hall.  
  
"No, you cannot have the shards of Narsil!"  
  
"They're still sharp!" bellowed Boromir randomly.  
  
"But dad," whined Glorfindel breathily, much like Arwen, "I wanna give them to Aragorn!"  
  
"Aragorn doesn't want them!" snapped Celeborn. He was about to continue when he tripped over something on the ground. Frodo.  
  
"Never mind me, I'm just Glorfindel!" the Hobbit said cheerfully.  
  
As if on impulse, Glorfindel grabbed a large vase and broke it over Frodo's head, then bounded off, yelling that he was going to steal Asfaloth.  
  
As the morning wore on, Pippin kept pulling Merry out from random places, each time saying the same line- 'Confound you, Samwise Gamgee!' When he wasn't doing that, he was bonking Gandalf on the head with his staff, screaming 'Fool of a Took'. When he felt like it, he bonked Elrond with a 'Fool of a Brandybuck' as well.  
  
As Galadriel, Legolas had no choice but to roam about with Gimli asking people about Gandalf. It would have been all right if the real Galadriel, still bearded, didn't follow him around telling him how beautiful he was and asking for strands of his hair.  
  
When Merry wasn't busy being pulled out of places by Pippin, he was following Aragorn around, and a very bored Boromir was stalking both.  
  
When evening fell, most of the inhabitants of the Last Homely House were exhausted. The only exceptions were Frodo, who had nothing to do but be knocked out, and Celeborn, who, being Elrond, had the life.  
  
When the sun set beyond the horizon, all the lanterns went out, and the company was plunged into darkness.  
  
There was a strangled yell and a loud thump, and then silence.  
  
When the Elves switched to full power glowing, they saw what the thump had been.  
  
One of them had been killed.  
  
Boromir, son of Denethor, was dead.  
  
"Darn".  
  
Poor, poor Boromir. I guess he's just fated to die. I hope this chapter wasn't too confusing! Try making a list or something- it really helps!  
  
Alright, readers- this is very important- tell me who you think the culprit is AND who you want to be the one to solve the mystery at the end. It might be of help to them. Your characters are depending on you! 


	4. The magic LCD Birdbath

Okidoke, people, from here on, I'll be putting names with a slash in to reduce, if not avoid confusion. Thanks to Oddwen for the idea, and all the rest of the reviewers, for bothering to try making sense out of the madness! To make the slash policy (not 'slash' slash, if you follow) clear, it will be like, while referring to the real Glorfindel, I'd type Glorfindel/Arwen, and Aragorn would be Aragorn/Frodo. You get me, right? The real person / who they're playing.  
  
On with the show!  
  
So Boromir was dead. Again.  
  
After the discovery of his 'dead' body and its following disposal (they locked him in a room with a strait jacket on), everyone had just gone up to their rooms, casting suspicious glances on each other.  
  
"Mister Frodo!" cried Merry/Sam, "You want food?"  
  
"No Sam," replied Aragorn/Frodo, opening his eyes as wide as they could go, "I don't think I'll ever eat again!"  
  
"Yeah, I know what you mean, if you know what I mean," said Merry/Sam, "seeing Sam/Aragorn chew up random weeds really ruins the appetite, if you follow me.beggin' your pardon, if you catch my meaning, Mister Frodo, sir!"  
  
Aragorn/Frodo knew there was a point in that speech somewhere, but thinking about it gave him a headache, especially with the horrible flattened Annie wig on his head and the stupid bicycle shorts.  
  
On his way to his chambers, he came across Legolas/Galadriel. He wanted to ignore the Elf in a dress, but Legolas turned on him and asked mysteriously, "Will you look into the mirror?"  
  
Aragorn/Frodo blinked. "Why should I?" he demanded.  
  
"Because I want you to! And I'll drown you in it if you don't do what I want, midget!!!"  
  
"Hey, Gally!" said Gimli/Celeborn, coming up. Aragorn/Frodo closed his eyes- the Dwarf looked positively frightening in his present get up.  
  
"Buzz off!" muttered Legolas/Galadriel. "You, Frodo, will look into the mirror. NOW!"  
  
Seeing as he had no choice, Aragorn/Frodo followed Legolas/Galadriel to a birdbath. He considered it better than having a long tiring conversation with Merry/Sam.  
  
"The mirror shows many things," said Legolas/Galadriel, "I hope."  
  
Aragorn/Frodo rolled his eyes and looked into the birdbath. To his surprise, he saw something. The watery surface of the bath was something like an LCD screen, so he had to stand on tiptoe to see clearly. A figure appeared in the bath, hooded and cloaked, but with a sword.  
  
"Hey that's mine!" muttered Aragorn/Frodo, but no sooner had the words escaped him that Elrond bellowed from somewhere- "STAY IN CHARACTER! NO OBJECTIONS!!"  
  
"Aragorn." said the figure, "I mean, Frodo. or whatever. Hi! I am an Exiled Knight."  
  
"Really? I'm an exiled King!"  
  
"No you're not!" screamed Elrond, "STAY IN CHARACTER!"  
  
"It was Glorfindel."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Glorfindel killed Boromir." said the figure in the bath.  
  
"No kidding!"  
  
Meanwhile, Legolas/Galadriel and Gimli/Celeborn stared at Aragorn/Frodo, now deep in conversation with the water filled ornamental piece of porcelain, in puzzlement.  
  
"He's talking to the birdbath!" remarked the Dwarf.  
  
"Maybe there's a bird in there!"  
  
Gimli/Celeborn shook his head and began walking away, talking to himself about finding Gandalf.  
  
Aragorn/Frodo, however, did not hear them.  
  
"Are you sure it was Glorfindel?" he asked the birdbath.  
  
"Or Frodo," put in the Exiled Knight helpfully.  
  
"But I'm supposed to be Frodo!"  
  
"The real one, idiot!"  
  
"Oh"  
  
As Aragorn/Frodo watched, the figure faded away, waving goodbye.  
  
When he turned, Legolas/Galadriel said, "I know what it is you saw, for it is also in my mind."  
  
"Really?" asked Aragorn/Frodo, "That's a really neat piece of technology!"  
  
"Eh?" asked Legolas/Galadriel, as Aragorn/Frodo went off, full of knowledge.  
  
Once he was gone, Legolas/Galadriel went over to the birdbath to look in, but before he got there, a strange but cute little purple bird fluttered onto it.  
  
"Shoo!" he said.  
  
"Don't you try to shoo me, Elf!" said the bird shrilly. "I am the voice of Plutostar!"  
  
"Plutostar?" asked Legolas/Galadriel.  
  
"Yeah, Plutostar!" yelled the bird, "Got a problem with that, bub?"  
  
Legolas/Galadriel looked offended. "I am not a bub! I am Galadriel, AND IN PLACE OF A DARK LORD YOU WILL HAVE-"  
  
The bird rubbed its ears. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I know you did it!"  
  
"Did what?"  
  
"DON'T DENY IT!" screeched the bird. "YOU KILLED BOROMIR!"  
  
"I did not!"  
  
"DON'T DENY IT!"  
  
"But I didn't!"  
  
"DON'T DENY IT!"  
  
"But-" began Legolas/Galadriel, but Plutostar interrupted again, "DIDN'T I TELL YOU NOT TO DENY IT? You should be ashamed of yourself, Legolas Greenleaf-"  
  
A voice shouted from far away, "Galadriel! NO OBJECTIONS!"  
  
Plutostar continued, unfazed, "-you have so many fangirls out there, and what do you do for them? You kill a person! Tut tut!"  
  
The bird flew away, apparently not having noticed that Legolas/Galadriel had fainted at the sudden mention of fangirls.  
  
It was not simply those two who had strange encounters, though. there were happenings within the Last Homely House as well.  
  
I know it's been a while- a LONG while, but I've got A-Levels coming up- study mania, you know!  
  
Well, now you know why I wanted your ideas! Thanks to Exiled-Knight and Plutostar. don't worry, you might still be right, no matter what the reactions are!  
  
Be patient, remaining reviewers, your turns will come!  
  
Until then, the question remains- Whodunit? 


	5. Pippin's Encounters

Guess, which much loved Hobbit, is indulging in some rule breaking? Is there a doubt? In case you've inconveniently forgotten, it's Real Person / Who they're playing. (i.e.- Aragorn/Frodo is Aragorn who's playing Frodo. Get it? Well, if you don't then, you shouldn't have forgotten!)  
Pippin/Gandalf crept towards a large table, his beard wrapped around his neck so he wouldn't trip over it. The room was deserted because it was still very early in the morning, and even the Elves were sleeping with their eyes open.  
  
Because of Elrond's stupid 'Stay in Character' rule, he couldn't eat eight square meals a day- not in public anyway. It wasn't cheating- who knew what Gandalf's culinary habits were? Under one arm he carried a box of Alphabet Cereal, and in the other, a bowl of milk.  
  
The last two- the bowl and milk, as most of Middle Earth would know, were a dangerous combination. As expected, the beard came undone and caused him trip on the staff that had unrolled from under it. With sure footedness that came to those in immense peril and immense hunger, he froze in the act of tripping, on tiptoes on one foot and the other serving as the platform for the box of cereal, while he held on the bowl for dear life.  
  
Silence.  
  
Pippin/Gandalf gave an unreasonably loud sigh of relief before toppling over with a loud crash. He watched in horror as the milk swept across the floor in front of him to where the cereal had spilled over. He considered eating it, and just as he pulled out a spoon from the depths of his vast grey cloak, the alphabets began moving about.  
  
"Argh!" cried Pippin/Gandalf, and hoped that Elrond hadn't heard that Out Of Character cry. The letters stopped moving about, forming a word.  
  
"HI!"  
  
"Hello!" he said to the cereal in pure Hobbitishness.  
  
"HOW ARE YOU, PIPPIN/GANDALF?" the cereal asked.  
  
"Great!" said Pippin/Gandalf, "Hungry though," he added with a glint in his eye as he fingered the silver spoon in his hand.  
  
"DON'T EAT ME, PIPPIN/GANDALF. I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO TELL YOU."  
  
"Can you tell me as I eat?"  
  
"NO. AWW.YOU HAVE SUCH A CUTE ACCENT!"  
  
"Is that all?" asked Pippin/Gandalf.  
  
"PIPPIN/GANDALF, I AM ELRENIA. IT WAS GLORFINDEL/ARWEN, PIPPIN/GANDALF!"  
  
"Which one?" asked Pippin/Gandalf, "Glorfindel, Arwen, Pippin/Gandalf or Gandalf? Wait a minute, I'm Pippin/Gandalf. I mean, I'm Gandalf. oh no! I have an identity crisis!"  
  
"KEEP TALKING," said the cereal that was called Elrenia, "AWESOME ACCENT.ER, SORRY. BUT IT WAS GLORFINDEL/ARWEN WHO KILLED BOROMIR. YOU MUST BRING HIM/HER TO JUSTICE!!!"  
  
Pippin/Gandalf looked confused. "Er, right. Umm. any idea why he/she did it?"  
  
"GLORFINDEL IS TROUBLED TO BEGIN WITH, AND THE ESSENCE OF ARWEN CORRUPTS HIS MIND. HE MUST HAVE TRIED TO KILL FRODO/GLORFINDEL AND KILLED BOROMIR/BOROMIR INSTEAD."  
  
"Ohh." said Pippin/Gandalf, trying to assimilate all that knowledge, "Hey, you just solved the mystery for me! Thanks!"  
  
"YOU'RE WELCOME, PIP/GANDY. MAY YOUR ACCENT EVER FLOURISH."  
  
The cereal scattered, and Pippin/Gandalf carefully collected it and put it back in the box, in case he felt like talking to it later.  
  
Hearing the prowling sound of Elrond/Merry coming to yell at him, Pippin/Gandalf scurried off, hiding the bowl and cereal and stuff under the table.  
  
He wandered through the woods of Rivendell, looking for perhaps a long forgotten feast or something. He was still hungry. He was about to resort to banging trees with his staff to get apples when he saw a glowy person approach. She was an Elf, he realized, with a gown patterned with buttercups.  
  
"And who are you supposed to be?" he asked. "My Elven Godmother? Because I'm really hungry!"  
  
"Nay, Pippin/Gandalf," said the person. "I am an Elf of Rivendell"  
  
"Okay." said Pippin/Gandalf. "Am I supposed to know you?"  
  
"I watch over little hungry Hobbits," said the Elf of Rivendell.  
  
"Yay!" cried Pippin/Gandalf. "So you have food?"  
  
"Perhaps," she replied. "Listen to me, Pippin/Gandalf."  
  
"Do I have a choice?"  
  
"No."  
  
Pippin/Gandalf shrugged. It wasn't the first time that day he'd not had a choice.  
  
"I saw something. Something no other Elf of Mirkwood-"  
  
"Rivendell," corrected Pippin/Gandalf.  
  
"Right, Rivendell. I saw something no Elf of Rivendell should have seen."  
  
"Is it below a PG-13 rating?"  
  
"Yup. I saw, in the darkest darkness, the eeriest eeriness, the creepiest creepiness. the murder of Boromir."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"No, but doesn't it sound cool?  
  
"Definitely," agreed Pippin/Gandalf. "So, can I get my food now?"  
  
"But I haven't told you who did it yet!" exclaimed the Elf of Rivendell.  
  
"Oh, I already know!" said Pippin/Gandalf happily, "The mystery's already been solved- it was Glorfindel/ Arwen!"  
  
The Elf of Rivendell gave him a blank look. "No it wasn't," she said.  
  
"It was too!" cried Pippin/Gandalf.  
  
"Was not!" exclaimed the Elf of Rivendell. "It was Frodo!"  
  
"Frodo/Glorfindel?" asked Pippin/Gandalf. "So what about Glorfindel/Arwen?"  
  
"It was Frodo," said the Elf of Rivendell firmly. " Frodo plays Glorfindel, so he MUST have done it! I mean, all he does now is pretend not to exist! There's plenty of opportunities to slip a kill and get away with it! It is up to you to solve the mystery.Frodo/Glorfindel killed Boromir!"  
  
"So the cereal was lying?" asked Pippin/Gandalf, looking confused.  
  
"Eh?" asked the Elf, bewildered. "You okay? You're talking about dishonest cereal. Here, take this!"  
  
She tossed him an apple. Then, she stepped back to go, waving cheerfully to the Hobbit.  
  
Pippin/Gandalf looked down at the apple. "This is it?" he asked.  
  
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away!" said the Elf of Rivendell. "Though illness is no problem in Rivendell with Elrond and.sigh. Aragorn around! See ya'!"  
  
She glowed and walked away. Pippin/Gandalf shrugged and bit into the apple.  
  
"So the cereal lied?" he asked himself.  
  
"Nah!" he said, finishing the apple in another bite. He had been VERY hungry. "Food always tells the truth. As Sam/Aragorn would say when he was just Sam- you can always trust food, and that's the truth!"  
  
Throwing the core into a nearby river, he decided to go back, looking forward to twisting Gandalf/ Pippin/Gandalf's ears a little more and pulling Merry/ Sam out of a bush somewhere again.  
  
However, Merry/Sam was having trouble of his own back at the Last Homely House.  
  
Well, that's about it! As you can guess, the next chapter'll be from Merry's point of view!  
  
Please do keep reviewing! There'll be a lot more 'guest' appearances, so have patience! 


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